Boketto (Japanese) – Gazing Vacantly (English)

Because my life is currently failing and because I have a plethora of people who see this daily, I’m asking you to click the link below this bit here and at least read what’s happening with me, the writer and maintainer of these works.
My life is moving forward and I don’t have too much longer to be expected to live it.

Sometimes hiding in strength can lead to moments of weakness.

I believe today has been one of those days for myself.

Though the idea of weakness is something which I both abhor and embrace, I feel that there are no other words that speak what I’m feeling.

Today has been emotional for me.

Emotion and my best writing works go hand in hand… But I think today is a different type of released expression.


Boketto is a Japanese word which frankly doesn’t have a good English translation.

The idea behind Boketto is staring at the sky without a thought… Losing ones own self in the distance.

I happened across the word in a forum today and was struck by how perfectly I understand it.

How much my American English upbringing failed to have such a miraculous word. And it also moved me to write on where I happen to be sitting in my life today. How I’ve been giving no thought to the world ahead of me.

I’m staring vacantly into a future unknown…

Giving no thought to the distance ahead of me.

It’s marvelous.

I keep trying to find a creative way to express what I happen to be feeling, and though I often pick apart my words when they aren’t thought out I think that today needs something simple.

I need to express emotion as it is without flair.

I’m content with where I am. Proud of myself for keeping the wonderful world around me together. I’m afraid of choosing the wrong choice and destroying what I’ve worked for as well though.

I feel alone.… But I also am, without doubt, finding comfort in someone who will never be able to be replaced. I’m stepping lightly in a friendship that has more meaning then the descriptive term friend can hold and finding that the relationship that we hold is more like being a couple without any sense of romance. This is something I will likely never have again and I am blessed to be able to have this friend in my life.

I’m struggling with being broken as well.

I hurt physically and emotionally, am afraid of venturing past self built walls put in for safety and yet angry that I’ve kept myself in a deep seclusion.

I have wonder that’s been watching from afar.

Keeping it’s distance in case I’m not the right choice.

I think I’ve lost my voice as well.

Though which voice it is I’m no longer sure.

Baffled with miracles and my ability to shrug off hits.

Conquered by unknown triggers. I’ll weep at the strangest of things.

Today I’ll be embracing Boketto.

Embracing gazing into the distance.

Nothing may come of it, but seeing where the future of my past has lead to my present I know that an answer will eventually be revealed.


Hey you! Yeah you, the person who just got done reading this piece!

Did you know that I have a handful of other spoken word poetry on this blog?

If the above work interests you, then please, take your time and peruse my work…

The worst that can happen is that the rhyme, meter, and content isn’t your cup of tea.

But the best?

Well, the best that can happen is you find yourself inspired… And that’s all a man can ask for!


8 thoughts on “Boketto (Japanese) – Gazing Vacantly (English)

  1. ‘Though the idea of weakness is something which I both abhor and embrace, I feel that ‘their’ are no other words that speak what I’m feeling.’
    The use of ‘their’ should be ‘there’ :)

    • Thank you!

      I’ll admit that as a primarily spoken word artist, that these sorts of errors usually fall right past me.

      If you (or anyone else who reads this blog!) ever find mistakes in my writing, grammar, or word usage, PLEASE continue to point them out to me!

      I’ve always needed an editor anyways :P

  2. In Jamaica we have a favourite expression for that stateof being and I believe the eminent Jimmy Cliff sum it up in his song “Sitting Here in Limbo”. It embodies all the concepts of boketto; which by the way is what part of speech? Does one boketto often? Or am I “Standing Here in Boketto”? Lovely article. One just can’t know too many words!

  3. I feel sad after reading the above. It gives a feeling of total loneliness. It may sound sweet and well thought about, but to me it is not, as I recognize this feeling.. It does not give hope nor a solution. It is a desperate way of asking for attention, which I accept. But I rather would like to help people to get out of this mood. My son struggles with his
    third culture expat emotions for quite some time . Clear to understand.
    But keeping focused on the past does not really solve this unhappy feeling.
    I sincerely hope that one day he will say goodbye to the past and embrace the future, whatever it is worth.
    It will always be better than concentrating on that big black whole, which seems to grow rather then to decline.

    • Peter, it’s been a while since you’ve written your comment towards this piece but I sincerely hope you find your way back to it as I think it was well meant and I apologize for not responding to it sooner.

      Simply put, you are more than right. Boketto in my life has always been bittersweet… Equal parts nostalgia and hope. To honestly admit that I have and continue to experience you’re perception of loneliness expressed in this prose would be an understatement… I have a love/hate relationship with Boketto simply because it is both raw yet layered in it’s complexity, each sentence has meaning wrapped in meaning wrapped in meaning and I adore…. Simply ADORE that you’ve found some of what I feel has been missed in Boketto. I was very alone and Boketto was escape for me.

      I don’t know if you’ve ever talked with your son about your worry and love for him but I would hope that you could find the vulnerability to do so.

      As someone who has all but lost my parents to the evils of their own problems I couldn’t even begin to express what it would mean to hear my own father connect with me in the way that I believe you have with this piece and the thoughts contained within.

      For what it’s worth, I thank you for being open with a stranger on the internet. You matter, your thoughts are heard, and your words are here to stay.

      Poetically Yours,

      Devin Erebus Faye

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